Love is a Cross

Love.

We throw around the word a lot. For years I have told my family and other girls that I love them. Often, it’s not something we think about when we say. And this year, while being at college and seeking to pour out myself for the hurting and broken around me, I’ve said over and over that I love these precious people.

It’s quite easy to say. But it’s very different when this love is required to act and must be worked out in the practical everyday life.

You see, love looks like a cross in practical, everyday living.

Henry Scougal says, “Love is the most valuable thing we can bestow, and by giving it, we do in effect give all that we have…Perfect love is a kind of self-dereliction, a wandering out of ourselves; it is a kind of voluntary death, wherein the lover dies to himself and all his own interest, not thinking of them nor caring for them anymore, and minding nothing but how we may please and gratify the party whom he loves.”

So, I can say that I love the hurting, broken, and lost. But what about when this love requires that I give up my perfectly planned afternoon to help someone in need? What about when it requires getting less sleep because someone needed to talk or God asked me to spend more time in prayer for their souls? What happens when this love requires giving up “my” possessions, “my” money, “my” time, “my” plans, and “my” sleep?

This is when true love is proven. I don’t love people because I have compassion toward them or hurt when they’re hurting. I love them when I’m willing to lay down my own life, my own plans, and my own agenda in order to show case Jesus to them. The mentality He has been working in me is that I have no time of my own. So, when someone needs something, I’m available. When I have the opportunity to give of what I have been blessed with, I’m available. There is not an allowance in my mind for the “what about me…or how will I be taken care??” thoughts. I am absolutely convinced that if Jesus calls me to it, He will take care of my every need.

So, it’s not enough to just say I love people. In fact, that means very little until it is lived out in everyday life. However, it’s imperative to remember that this is utterly, completely, and wholly impossible. I have no love for others in and of myself. I must have His love. I must let Him give me His heart for those around me and rely wholly upon Jesus’ grace in order to serve those around me.

They will know us by our love. 

I want to be Immovable

This morning as I was reading Colossians 2, I came across verse 5:

“For though I should be absent in the flesh, yet am I with you in the spirit, joying and beholding your order; and the steadfastness of your faith in Christ.”

Steadfast means “that which has been made firm (a fortified place); one which furnishes a foundation; on which a thing rests firmly and is supported; firmness (in a military sense: solid front); make solid, make firm, strengthen, make strong; firm, immovable, solid, rigid.” It comes from a word meaning “to stand.”

I want this word to describe me. Lately, I’ve been noticing that I tend to be moved by small things or by trivial annoyances or inconveniences. However, He has been giving me a resoluteness that it truly not of myself. Instead of getting annoyed when I am inconvenienced or when I have to do something I’d rather not do, I’ve been exhorting myself to be immovable.

I want to be able to be hit with the hardest of circumstances and not be moved. I want to hear the worst news ever and be immovable. I want to set my forehead as flint to seek Him, no matter what that means and no matter what the enemy may bring against me. Because it’s not about how I feel or what makes me comfortable or happy. It’s about HIS glory. And that’s all that matters – not my sensibilities or desires.

“Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as you know that your labor is not in vain in the Lord.” 1 Corinthians 15: 58

“I have set the Lord always before me: because He is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.” Psalm 16: 8

“Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and He shall sustain thee: He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.” Psalm 55: 22

“My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from Him. He only is my Rock and my Salvation: He is my Defense; I shall not be moved. In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God. Trust in Him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before Him: God is a refuge for us.” Psalm 62: 5-8

Though He has begun to form this in me, I am continually asking Him to increase it. I have it in a small measure, but oh, I want it such a greater and fuller measure! And yes, that means my circumstances or seeming “inconveniences” may get greater or harder, but I know that this is just Him refining me and purifying me, making me strong and fortified so that nothing will be able to move me! And He is forming this in me so that I can stand between the enemy and those that may be weaker and able to moved. I am clothed in Christ so that nothing can touch me. Then, I am able to stand in front of others so that the enemy cannot touch them either.

O, Lord, make me immovable.

On Letting Him Hold and Plan the Future...

      Oh, Jesus’ timing is perfect!  How often do I forget that He knows all things and that I can trust Him to bring the right circumstances together at the right time with no manipulation of them on my part? What seems really good to me at the time is often not part of my God’s perfect plan that will bring the best, the great satisfaction, or the most glory to Him. 

Oh, Lord, look at this wonderful opportunity!

Then the door closes for some reason.

          Not now, dear one, He whispers.

Oh, Jesus, surely this is of You! How could it not be? I would be serving and loving people, sharing the Gospel. If only You’d let me go!

          I have you where you are for a reason, My daughter. Trust Me. Be silent. Be still.

God, if I don’t hurry up and act on this, I’ll never have another opportunity! Maybe all the positions will fill up or it won’t present itself again!

          When it’s My timing, I will make a way. Never forget, beloved, that I am God. I hold it all together.

Some verses that He really used to convict but also comfort and encourage me tonight were:

“He preserves the way of His saints.” Proverbs 2: 8

          *Preserves means to keep, guard, protect, and pay heed to. He keeps, guards, protects, and pays heed to His purpose and plan. He will not let it slip or fall through His fingers. When it’s His timing, He will most certainly make a way. And nothing will be able to interfere with it!

“Yet in this thing you did not believe the Lord your God, Who went in the way before you, to search you out a place to pitch your tents in, in fire by night, to show you by what way you should go, and in a cloud by day.” Deuteronomy 1: 33

        *He has gone before! He knows the way, and He knows where and when the situation is supposed to come about. Take courage!

“The steps of a good man are ordered (established) by the Lord, and he delights in His way.” Psalm 37: 23

          *the word ordered (or established in some translations) is in the perfect tense, meaning it’s already done and completed. His plan and purpose for my future is already completed. He knows what you will be doing this summer, next fall, in 5 years, etc. He has is already figured out, meaning we don’t need to try to figure out our futures.

“The Lord knows the way of the righteous…” Psalms 1: 6

*The Greek translation of the Old Testament translates the word “know” as Ginosko, which is the intimate form of knowing, as in a marriage relationship. God intimately knows our futures and ways. It’s not something that He just thinks about now and again or that’s no-big-deal if it “happens” to get messed up. He intimately knows it and will care for it!

“With him is an arm of flesh; but with us is the Lord our God to help us and to fight our battles.” II Chronicles 32: 8

So the question now is: will we choose to manipulate our circumstances and take things into our own hands to accomplish what we think would be best? Or will we let Him fight on our behalf? Will we let Him write our life stories and make them far more beautiful than we ever could?

“It is a mercy that our lives are not left for us to plan, but that our Father chooses for us; else might we sometimes turn away from our best blessings, and put from us the choicest and loveliest gifts of  His providence.” Susannah Spurgeon

He Asks for Everything

I think we've been comfortable for far too long.

We’ve been comfortable with our mediocre, have-God-on-my-terms Christianity for far too long. This lukewarm, one-foot-in-the-world version of Christianity that we’ve concocted is not the version of the Bible.

You see, Jesus asks for everything.

“If any man will come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me. For whosever will save his life shall lose it: but whosever will lose his life for My sake, the same shall save it.” Luke 9: 23-24

I grew up thinking that since I said the sinner’s prayer when I was 10 years old, I was fine. I was going to heaven in the end, and God was happy with me. I mean, I had accepted Him and everything, right? So, what more did He want with my life? Sure, I knew that I needed to tack on a few more morals to look “better,” but I could still look like the rest of the world for the most part.

I could listen to the same music. I could wear the same clothes. I could participate in the same entertainment. I could make the same choices in regards to relationships and follow the world’s pattern for dating. Right?

No.

He asks for it all. Absolutely everything must be laid upon the altar. Nothing held back.

“And being in Bethany, in the house of Simon the leper, as he sat at meat, there came a woman having an alabaster box of ointment of spikenard very precious; and she broke the box, and poured it on His head.” Mark 14: 3

She broke it all out upon Jesus. A word in “spikenard” isn’t translated but is included in the Greek. It’s pistikos and means object of faith or trust. All that she had worked for and had confidence in was laid at the feet of Jesus.

"If the ultimate, the hardest, cannot be asked of me; if my fellows hesitate to ask it and turn to someone else, then I know nothing of Calvary love."

Amy Carmichael

“She stood, as it were, with her face to God and her back to the people, waiting to receive His Word for the ‘chosen people.’ She had a vision of the holy living. She would not deviate from that no matter how well established, rational, and practical the ways of older missions seemed to be.”

Elisabeth Elliot, in speaking of Amy Carmichael, who left her comfortable existence in England to rescue little girls from temple prostitution in India

So, the question we must ask ourselves is: Does Jesus have everything? Does He have all my hopes, my dreams, my future, my decisions…my life?

Because true life and fulfillment cannot come until He does. It’s just the Gospel. 

Gaining His heart

Lately, I have felt something I have never felt with such intensity before. Sure, the feeling has been present in my soul in the past, and God has just increased it over the years as I continue to gain His heart for those around me. But feeling it to this level? Well, it’s all new…

You see, there are a group of children that I have the privilege of spending every Monday evening with and usually other times throughout the week, as well. All it takes is one of them to look up at me with their sweet, innocent little face, and I break. I want to wrap each and every single one of them in my arms and never let go. I want to hold each one until all their pain is gone. All I want is to pour HIS love into them. Dear God, break me more for these precious ones…

As I have been studying through the book of I Thessalonians, I have come across certain phrases that I had never really given much thought to, skipped over, and maybe thought were kind of strange before. Phrases such as,

“So being affectionately desirous of you, we were willing to have imparted unto you, not the Gospel of God only, but also our own souls, because you were dear unto us.” 2: 8

“We exhorted and comforted and charged every one of you, as a father does his children.” 2:11

“But we, brethren, being taken (to bereave of a parent; to be rendered an orphan) from you for a short time in presence, not in heart, endeavored the more abundantly to see your face with great desire…For what is our hope, or joy, or crown of rejoicing? Are not even you in the Presence of our Lord Jesus Christ at His coming? For you are our glory and joy.” 2: 17, 19-20

“For now we live, if you stand fast in the Lord. For what thanks can we render to God again for you, for all the joy wherewith we joy for you sakes before our God: night and day praying exceedingly that we might see your face, and mighty perfect that which is lacking in your faith? 3: 8-10

However, now I understand what Paul meant.

The Thessalonians weren’t Paul’s actual children, obviously. Yet, he felt such deep affection and love for them, it seemed like they were. This is what God has been doing in my heart for these precious children I get to work with. Everything with me longs to see them come to know the Gospel. And, like 2:8 says, I am so willing to just spend and spill my life for them, not only giving them the Gospel.

And though I long to just pour my life into them constantly and ache after just a day or two of not seeing them, He has called me to “night and day pray exceedingly” that they might come to know Him and be raised up into mighty men and women of Truth. Will I, and you also, choose to stand between the hurt, vulnerable, and weak around the world and the enemy, who only wants to destroy them?

“And He saw that there was no man, and wondered that there was no intercessor…” Isaiah 59: 16

“I delivered the poor that cried, and the fatherless, and him that had none to help him…I was a father to the poor: and the cause which I knew not, I searched out. And I broke the jaws of the wicked, and plucked the spoil of his teeth.” Job 29

“He pleads effectively because he gives his life for those he pleads for; he is their genuine representative. He has submerged his self-interest in their needs and sufferings, and as far as possible has literally taken their place.” Norman Grubb, Rees Howells: Intercessor

“While women weep, as they do now, I'll fight; while children go hungry, as they do now I'll fight; while men go to prison, in and out, in and out, as they do now, I'll fight; while there is a drunkard left, while there is a poor lost girl upon the streets, while there remains one dark soul without the light of God, I'll fight; I'll fight to the very end!” William Booth